'Wedding Amnesia' and other follies of love.

I've been working from home a lot this summer and typically leave the TV on in the background so the house seems more 'happening' while I'm alone. Usually, I leave it on TLC, unless it's baby show time (I just want to enjoy married life in peace for a little while), in which case it's on Slice: whatever fluff is running that doesn't distract me from work, but keeps me company.

Anyway, during the day there are a lot of wedding shows on these stations: Wedding S.O.S, Rich Bride/Poor Bride, In-Law Wedding Wars, Four Weddings.....and so on. After passively watching literally hundreds of episodes of these shows, I noticed (sometimes it takes me a while to clue in) that as the half hour draws to a close the bride and groom predictably say "Our wedding day was absolutely perfect."

Every time. Never mind that the makeup artist didn't show up, the best man lost the rings, a cat wandered into the church and coughed up a hairball in the aisle, the minister fainted and the bride's grandmother caught on fire. I think it's a safe bet that even when the best man pushed that bride into the lake on AFV, the couple beamingly reported that their wedding was absolutely perfect: the best day ever.

Looking back to my own wedding a few weeks ago, I can't think of a single thing that went wrong. It all seems so warm, fuzzy and lovely in my mind. Even the things that didn't go exactly as planned, seem like they were better for the change. 

Best. day. ever.

Is there some sort of wedding amnesia?

Something like the pregnancy amnesia that makes mothers who practically died in labour (if you catch them right after the birth they grab at your sleeve sobbing "Never again. Never again" repeatedly) go back and do it again several months later.

And really, if there is such a thing as wedding amnesia and therefore it always seems "perfect, the best day ever", why do we stress out so much about it for months and months before? Why do we morph into bridezillas and make everyone crazy on our rampage to wrangle every single detail into perfection? Why do we bankrupt ourselves trying to create an event that will be so glorious it will live on forever in our minds, when it obviously will, no matter what we do, no matter how it turns out?

Maybe it's because down the line, when the glow of warm fuzzy love dulls a little after a fight over who left the milk on the counter overnight (if that bastard would just admit it, I could forgive him and we could move on) or when we feel a little neglected or distant from our once warm and communicative spouse, it's then that we envelop ourselves in the memories, pore through the photos to remind us of how pretty we looked, how his eyes shone when he saw us coming down the isle, how hard we laughed when that cat barfed on the runner, and how those little things that went wrong on our wedding day just bonded the two of us even closer. Like a little practice run for real life, our wedding day: us against the odds.

So even though we're pissed about whatever, we think back to this bond and feel the anger and upset fade as we look at his beautiful sleeping profile. We remember how we're supposed to side together against the world as we snuggle in around him and fall asleep listening to him snore like a purring lion. Maybe it's not so much wedding amnesia as wedding remembrance. Maybe every wedding day is perfect. The best ever.